If you are looking for a way to get closer to your partner and experience more intimacy in your relationship, this Tantric Massage Guide for Beginners is exactly what you need. In this step-by-step DIY guide we will walk you through everything you need to know. The instructions found in this article are great for people who have never tried sensual massage. Whether you’re trying it for the first time or brushing up on some old skills, we have all the questions and answers you need to understand and execute sensual, sexy tantric massage. Are you ready to get started?

To the uninformed and the uninitiated tantric massage can seem like a mysterious activity. For those who practice this ancient tantric art, the act of a simple massage is elevated to an intimate and spiritual experience. Tantric massage is the best of all worlds:  it combines sensuality and spirituality for a completely immersive and holistic experience. While tantric massage can be focussed on your aches and pains it is also an incredible conduit to intimacy.  There is much to learn and know about this ancient practice but luckily you don’t have to be an expert to reap the benefits. Even the most remedial tantric massage feels incredible and has more benefits than a regular massage.  There’s really no reason not to try tantric massage and this beginner’s guide makes it easy to step into this world of endless pleasure. 

What is tantric massage?

Tantric massage is a style of body to body massage that has been practiced for centuries.  It is one facet of the physical and spiritual care that tantra, an ancient holistic wellness system from India, offers. In order to fully understand the ins-and-outs of tantric massage one must first understand what tantra is, how it came to be, and what its principles are.

What is Tantra?

The word Tantra is a Sanskrit term that translates into English, roughly as “ woven web”.  This description is apt because the tantric system is based on the concept of divine universal connectivity. Tantra teaches us about our connection to ourselves, to others, and to the Divine powers of the universe.  Historically Tantra was a highly spiritual practice designed in sixth-century India,  with many of its tenets based in Hinduism and Buddhism. Luckily one does not have to be a practitioner of either of these religions in order to experience Tantra. The original documentation of tantric beliefs included a clean-living lifestyle. Over time, the definitions and boundaries of Tantra have shifted and changed but at their essence they remain the same;  introspective and focused on living the best, most fruitful life possible through self-reflection and self-expression.

Who can perform tantric massage

Historically tantric massage would have only been practiced by experienced tantric teachers and Yogi’s.  In the modern Western World we have a grave misunderstanding of Tantra because our media has portrayed it as  an experience that is inextricably linked to either sex or yoga. While tantric yoga and tantric sex are both real things, tantric massage is its own world and does not have to include yoga or sex.  Tantric massage can be provided by tantric- trained professionals but you can also give it a go at home. DIY tantric massage is absolutely possible though it will never be as deep or as effective as the professional version. If you’re looking to improve intimacy or change things up in the bedroom, giving your partner a massage with tantric elements can be a great way to refresh your relationship.

Who is tantric massage for?

Tantric massage is good for everyone.  At its core, tantric massage focuses on the movement and redistribution of energy trapped within the body.  This makes tantric massage particularly helpful for people who have long-standing injuries or traumas because tantric massage acknowledges both the physical need for relief as well as the spiritual and emotional need for relief. 

One does not need to be flexible or fit or knowledgeable in Tantra carts to partake in tantric massage.  All the tantric massage requires of its recipient is relaxation, an open mind, and willingness to receive the fruits of Tantra. Most tantric massage is sensual and erotic, if not  overtly sexual,  so it is definitely an adults-only experience.  That said,  there are plenty of tantric practitioners who offer non-sexual and non erotic massage that  can be highly effective when combined with talk therapy or other emotional and mental support.

DIY vs the professional experience

There will always be a marked difference between a professional experience and a DIY experience, no matter what the topic is. When it comes to tantric massage, DIY can be great and it can be whatever you make of  it.  But a professional tantric massage experience is a whole other level of pleasure. She also has the tantric know-how to provide pleasure you may never have even considered. The professional tantric experience is not always for everyone, and that’s understandable, but that doesn’t mean you can’t experience Tantra on your own terms in your own home. Providing a tantric massage for a partner can be a great way to connect or reconnect and  makes excellent foreplay before love making. 

What does tantric massage feel like?

It is impossible to describe a tantric massage with just a few words.  The experience is often regarded as: 

  • Powerful
  • Life-changing
  • Intimate
  • Sensual
  • Mind expanding 

Tantric massage goes far beyond the physical body. Going back to the definition of Tantra being ” woven web”,  the experience is multifaceted and stimulating in many different ways.  A professional tantric massage may not be as intimate as a DIY massage with your partner, but it still requires a degree of focus and vulnerability.  The other side of that vulnerability is where the true benefits of tantric massage can be found.

What are the benefits of tantric massage?

Imagine receiving a massage that makes you feel better in your very soul.  That’s essentially how you feel after a proper tantric massage.  Here at Secret Tantric all of our masseuses are fully trained in anatomy, physiology, and all physical aspects of massage. They are also well-versed in the culture and history of Tantra as well as  being experts at all things sensual and erotic.  Tantric massage leaves you feeling both relaxed and rejuvenated physically, as well as satisfied and excited sexually and emotionally. It is truly the best of all worlds. 

Many of our clients have given us feedback about experiencing the benefits of their tantric massage  for several days after their appointment. These noted benefits range from improved focus and mental acuity, improved patience and temper, better sleep,  more energy and increased libido.  Tantric massage can also be  a form of rehabilitation after sexual trauma, and it can help with erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. 

Is it strictly sexual?

No, tantric massage is not always strictly sexual. Tantric massage is an erotic and sensual activity. It is not necessarily sexual and does not include sexual intercourse. If you are providing a DIY massage to your partner at home, tantric massage is a wonderful form of foreplay and can be a beautiful gateway too intense, intimate, and erotic sex. 

However, if you are visiting a tantric masseuse professional, do not expect that sex will be on the menu. At Secret Tantric our losses are just that:   masseuses, not escorts.  Our tantric massages do come with an optional ‘happy ending’  but even that is at the discretion of both the client and the masseuse.

Prepare your at home DIY tantric massage

If you are planning a tantric massage at home for you and your partner, you will want to consider a few details. A little bit of preparation will make this beautiful experience even more rich and inviting for your partner. It’s important to remember that because you are not a professional tantric masseuse, you do not need to hold yourself to professional tantric standards. Technique is all well and good and should definitely be considered but do not worry about doing it “ right”.  So long as both you and your partner are consenting to the activity and communicating about how the touch feels, there’s really no wrong way for you to do it.

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Step-by-step tantric massage

Get prepared

There’s very little preparation that is required for DIY tantric massage. A few details will make the whole experience more delightful: 

Talk to your partner.  

Introducing the idea of a DIY tantric massage for your partner is probably not a very hard task. Never the last before you go to the effort of readying yourself for this experience. It’s best to talk to them about it and ensure that they are as excited as you are.  There’s no need to worry or stress. Remember this is about relaxation so don’t get yourself wound up too tight about technique or making everything perfect.

Invest in comfort

A good  massage oil is really all you need for an excellent at-home tantric massage. But oil is as messy as it is sexy and slippery so take a few precautions:  be sure that you acquire some dark coloured towels or drop cloths for the area where you will perform the massage so that any spills can simply be ignored and will not interrupt the massage itself.  If you really want to go all out, purchase an inexpensive inflatable bed or mattress and use it as the platform for your tantric massage. This will make clean up easier as well as keeping the mess to a minimum during the massage. Likewise the inflatable mattress will give you a unique buoyancy and movement which can make for some very exciting touch.

Set the tone

Professional tantric massage  tends to be a multi-sensory experience  and it is advised that you aim for the same thing at home.  Scented candles,  quality massage oils, soft background music, and uninterrupted privacy are  just a few ideas for making your DIY massage intimate and special. If you’re going to the effort of a full body tantric massage you may as well go for broke and enjoy all the bells and whistles.

How to do it:  step-by-step tantric massage

Prepare your massage space and have all of your supplies ( oil, lube, candles Etc)  at the ready

Begin with a bath or shower with your partner. This will  achieve a number of things:  it will soften and warm up your muscles making you more receptive to the physical massage.  your skin will be primed to accept the massage oil which will make the massage more comfortable for the recipient and less taxing for The Giver.  bathroom shower also allows you and your partner to set the tone for intimacy and intensity. Enjoy each other and savour the experience.

Pro Tip: Breathe together.  Syncing up your breath will eventually sink up your heartbeats. 

Have your partner lay face down so you can begin the massage.  Start with their feet, being mindful not to tickle, work up one leg and  then the other, using the heel of your hand to push and knead their flesh gently, as well as your fingertips.

Initially,  ignore their erogenous zones.  You will have plenty of time to double back and touch their most exquisite parts  but to begin with simply touch and tease and please them with your mindful and considerate touch. Work up over their back and shoulders and down their arms to their hands,  slowly making your way back to their buttocks, etc.

Pro Tip: Don’t be cheap with the oil!  Apply massage oil as needed to keep things sexy and silky.

Have your partner turn over so that you can repeat the process from toes to shoulders on the front side again avoiding direct contact with their genitals and erogenous zones. 

Once their whole body has been touched and massaged it’s time to focus on the sexier spots.

Pro Tip: If you are massaging a woman and touching her vulva or vagina, make sure that the oil you are using is not scented and contains no additives or synthetics.  Feel free to Switch to a body safe lubricant that is pH balanced for the vagina.  The last thing you want to do is give her a UTI, which will ensure that she never wants another massage again!

The two of you can elect to take turns with your  tantric massage or you can indulge in mutual massage where you sit or lay together and massage each other simultaneously. This form of massage lends itself well to easing into intercourse or other sexual acts with your partner.


Both you and your partner will feel incredibly relaxed and rejuvenated from your tantric experience.  Have another bathroom shower together to clean yourselves up and enjoy some quiet thoughtful discussion. We recommend that you debrief about the massage experience. Talk about what worked and where you would change things next time. No two people are the same, therefore no tantric massage will be the same. Create a safe and intimate space where you and your partner can discuss your desires and give feedback. This will go a long way in contributing to the intimacy that Tantra supports.

In conclusion 

Tantric massage is a beautiful way to connect with a partner. This is true even if you are both beginners and neither of you know what you were doing!  Historically tantric massage has been a slow and detailed process that was only performed by professionals and spiritual practitioners. In this day and age Tantra is more accessible than ever. Try DIY at home tantric massage with your partner to experience the benefits of this age-old technique. If you’re feeling brave, book yourself a session with a professional masseuse either alone or with your partner. Counterintuitive as it may seem, it can help you open doors to new intimacy together. Likewise, giving you valuable skills to try together at home.

What are you waiting for? 

There are no tangible downsides to tantric massage. This is especially true when you are dealing with an agency like Secret Tantric. We promise you that every element of your massage is professional and above board. There’s really no reason not to try a tantric massage! Pick up the phone and give us a call. We would be delighted to walk you through every detail and support you in this incredible journey you have begun.   

Whether you are looking for an exotic massage for you and a partner for yourself, we have what you want. Our girls are the most beautiful in London, if not the world! We are confident that every session you book with us will be better than the last. No matter your reasons for booking with us, we will always leave you satisfied, to whatever degree you desire.

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