The topic of tantric sex is getting a lot of attention right now. Everywhere you look magazines and websites are flaunting the benefits of a tantric lifestyle, and more specifically tantric sex. So what exactly is tantric sex? And more importantly, how can tantric sex improve your relationship?

Tantra and tantric sex  have acquired a reputation as mysterious practices.  Oftentimes anything that comes from another place, or is part of a different culture, is seen as exotic.  This is part of why Tantra is  so revered and so misunderstood. as with many things that originated somewhere else, we tend to oversimplify them. This is why very few people commit to an entirely tantric lifestyle, and instead pick and choose the parts that will work with their lives. For most, the easiest and most obvious peace is tantric sex.  But can it really make things better?  Is it really that good?  Yes, and yes. 

What is Tantra?

Tantra is a holistic Wellness philosophy that originated in India and Tibet in the sixth century.  The roots of Tantra are firmly planted in Hinduism and Buddhism, though one needs no particular religious or spiritual affiliation to incorporate tantric practices into their life. The original forms of Tantra were developed as a form of socio-political resistance. The teachings insisted on beauty and harmony in the face of less humane and more barbaric cultural practices.  Some of the major tenets of Tantra included clean living, vegetarian,  pacifism, sexual equality, and spiritual enlightenment. Modern Tantra is Not as restrictive and less moralized than its ancient counterpart.

What we mean by tantric sex

Tantric sex refers to  sex that is purposefully and intentionally aligned with tantric philosophy. 4 modern couples this often looks like slower, more connected and more intimate sex. Tantric sex also takes the focus away from orgasm. Climaxing, both alone and together, is an important and valuable part of tantric sex, but it is not the be-all end-all. Instead, tantric sex relies on eye contact, focused breathing, intimate talk and touch, and trust. Tantra, and therefore tantric sex, are centered around self understanding and connection. This connection refers to the ability to connect with oneself, one’s partner, and with the universe/the divine.

The benefits of tantric sex

Tantric sex is easily the most intuitive, connected, and intimate sex you will ever have. So much of what our culture has taught us about sex is about speed and efficiency. The tantric path helps individuals explore the journey through sex and intimacy instead of focussing on the destination. When we free ourselves of the importance of climax, we are much more open and available to actually be present within relationship, as well as the sex we’re having.

Tantric sex really can improve your relationship

You may be reading this and thinking, “Wow! Tantric sex sounds like a lot of work!”  And you’re not wrong. Tantric sex requires commitment and focus by both partners. It is not something that can be rushed, and to rush would be to defeat the entire purpose. The greatest benefit that a couple will experience from tantric sex is the desire to reinvest in the relationship.  Engaging in tantric sex means listening to your partner. It means seeking communication and consent from your partner as you go through the process of relaxing and giving pleasure to each other. Tantra requires you to communicate and share with a degree of courage that neither of you may be used to.  Not everything that can be remedied or solved through tantric sex will be experienced the first time. Tantra is a practice, it requires repetition and ongoing analysis and Improvement. 

It’s time to agree on the kind of sex you want to have

Often, one of the biggest issues facing couples whose relationships are in trouble is intimacy. It is not uncommon for a couple to try tantric sex and realize that this is the kind of sex they should have been having all along. It’s so easy to get overwhelmed by life and to allow your sex life to become shallow and transactional. Tantric sex is the opposite of shallow and transactional, it is deep and fully integrated. The goal of tantric sex is to unite your energy, effectively becoming one being while in that state. For some couples, this level of intimacy is too much and can be problematic, but for those who want to re-engage and improve their sex life, tantric sex can be a great start.

Perhaps a couples massage is in order …

Here at Secret Tantric we have a very popular couples’ massage option. These exciting and informative sessions involve one masseuse and one couple. Your masseuse will guide you through the process and teach you both important tips and tricks for communicating verbally and non-verbally during sex. This kind of direct coaching can be very helpful because it allows you to learn in real time. While you and your partner will not be having sex in front of your masseuse, you will have the opportunity to enjoy a massage performed by your tantric therapist as well as each other. All of the couples who have seen us for couples massage have reported back that it made a difference in the relationship. Sometimes all it takes is regrouping about what makes you tick and what you need from one another.

Are you ready to try tantric sex?

If the idea of trying tantric sex with your partner sounds exciting and positive, be sure to start an open dialogue about it. Many people are under the misunderstanding that tantric sex is difficult and not very sexy. This perception can be blamed in part on a misunderstanding of the Kama Sutra, India’s ancient guide to sacred sex positions. The Kama Sutra makes tantric sex look downright acrobatic. But we promised, tantric sex can be achieved by anyone of any level of ability, gender, or sexual orientation. Tantric sex is for everyone!

What are you waiting for?

If you are ready to reap the benefits of seeing a tantric therapist, give us a call. We are committed to answering all of your questions so you make a choice that is right for you.  We want to make tantric therapy accessible and available for everyone. Give us a call today. A visit to a tantric therapist can put you on a path to self improvement and sexual freedom. 

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