Lingam massage is one of our most popular types of massage.  This is not surprising because most men want to touch their lingam.  But as a client, what are the rules, best practices and etiquette involved in lingam massage?  Consider this article your official guide to not making a fool of yourself and having a great time.

For those who are unaware of the term, lingam is a word derived from Sanskrit that refers to maleness, but more specifically the male member.  Stimulating the lingam through lingam massage is a common practice within tantric massage.  Tantra is an age-old discipline rooted in ancient Hindu and Buddhist concepts. The word ‘tantra’ is also Sanskrit and roughly translates to “web, ” referencing the interconnections of the human mind, body, spirit, and all things in the universe. 

Lingam and Yoni

‘lingam’ refers to the penis, and the word Yoni refers to the vulva and vagina. These terms are common within tantric practice because of the tantric belief that these parts of the human body hold and manifest sexual energies.  It is believed that massaging the lingam and Yoni can relieve tension and negative feelings about sex and your body. Likewise, the lingam and Yoni can be stimulated specifically to cause pleasure. This is why lingam and Yoni massages are incredibly popular in modern tantric practice.

What does a ‘lingam massage’ mean?

A lingam massage is a penis massage. It is easy to assume that a lingam massage is a glorified handjob, but nothing could be further from the truth. While a lingam massage does involve massaging the lingam, it also comes with other sensual massage techniques and may or may not involve anal penetration and stimulation of the prostate.

Mind your manners

It may feel like a real power move to pay someone to massage your penis, but a lingam massage is more than just a hasty rub and tug to get off.  Lingam massage is a deep and intimate exercise with awesome pleasure benefits.  At Secret Tantric, our masseuses are consummate professionals, and they expect that you will also be professional and behave appropriately. But what does appropriate look like?

What NOT to do during your lingam massage

As you can imagine, tantric masseuses hear inappropriate comments from clients. You must understand that your interactions with your masseuse can and will directly impact whether or not you can book another appointment at Secret Tantric. We take a zero-tolerance approach to impropriety because the safety and comfort of our masseuses are always a top priority. That said, here are some things you should avoid saying and doing during your lingam massage:

  • You don’t need to talk.  You can talk if you wish, but do not feel you must fill the silence by making jokes or flirting with your masseuse. Lingam massages are best enjoyed when you are focused and present. Feel every single touch!
  • You don’t need to ‘drive’. A lingam massage is a great opportunity to lay back and enjoy yourself simply. She knows what she’s doing and will adjust her technique based on your feedback, but you do not need to control the situation. Let her do her job and enjoy the benefits!
  • Don’t try to make yourself come.  The pacing of your session is carefully considered.  Tantric massage uses the tension of sexual energy to build towards the climax. If you are unnecessarily thrusting and trying to get across the finish line without her, you are defeating the purpose of the entire appointment.
  • You needn’t apologize or explain.  Believe us, it is completely normal during a lingam massage for a man’s level of arousal to fluctuate. As mentioned above, nervousness, anticipation,  and many other factors can affect his lingam’s ‘performance’. There’s no need to apologise for this or explain because we’ve seen it all. Our masseuses are well-versed in how the human lingam works and do not expect you to be rock hard from beginning to end. Try not to overthink!

Specific things you can do to make your lingam massage even better

Acting appropriately during your lingam massage takes zero effort. Appropriate behaviour will be noticed and appreciated by your masseuse. Don’t be the guy that harasses his masseuse or mansplains to her how to do her job. Instead, consider that your role in the lingam massage is to be present and enjoy yourself.

  • Relax.  That may sound obvious, but relaxing at the hands of a gorgeous woman while she’s holding your penis can be harder than you think it is (pun very much intended). Your masseuse will no doubt recognise your tension, but there’s nothing wrong with expressing nervousness or anticipation.  The more you share how you feel, the better she can accommodate and improve those feelings.
  • Don’t forget to breathe! You’d be shocked at the number of times that our masseuses have to remind clients to breathe during your sessions. The combination of those nerves, excitement, arousal, and, sadly, sometimes shame, can make you forget to breathe deeply and fully.  Deep breathing floods your system with oxygen and improves your circulation, two things that are vital to excellent arousal as well as relaxation.
  • Just enjoy the ride!  Most of our clients are men, and most men naturally take control of intimate situations, especially when they’re nervous or uncomfortable. You may not know what to do with yourself in the presence of a woman you hardly know who is stunningly beautiful while you’re paying for a massage –  it can be a lot to take in! – but try to remember why you’re there: this is the ultimate in self-care, and you are doing yourself a service by giving yourself this experience. Let yourself enjoy it.

The long and the short of lingam massage

Whether it’s your first leave a massage or your hundredth, minding your p’s and q’s is important. We understand that as pleasurable as a lingam massage; it is not necessarily a simple or uncomplicated experience for everyone. Self-esteem, trauma, and other negative past experiences can inform your willingness and ability to relax and enjoy a lingam massage. There is nothing wrong with that fluctuation. Your masseuse will be courteous and supportive regardless of your body’s response. Likewise, as the client, you should be courteous as well. The etiquette involved in lingam massage is simple and should be common sense. 

For more information on massage etiquette we recommend that you read Erotic Massage Etiquette Mistakes for more information on how to have an enjoyable tantric massage.

What are you waiting for?

It’s one thing to read about the lingam massage experience in London but it is something else entirely to have your own. There’s no reason to hesitate; simply pick up the phone and give us a ring, and we will set you up for the time of your life within minutes. Whether you seek deep tissue relaxation or a slippery, sexy, happy-ending massage, Secret Tantric has what you need. And we know how to give it to you!  Call us today to set up your appointment. You will not regret it!

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