Recently we posed a question that a first-time client was willing to help us answer. We were curious: can sensual massage improve sexual confidence? Who better to ask than a new client who was seeking just that! Here is what he had to say on the matter.

Allow us to introduce you to Matthew.  He is a 33 year old software engineer from London who recently went through a difficult breakup and was looking to get back on his feet, and back into the dating world. After receiving some harsh feedback from his ex-girlfriend, and doing the subsequent soul-searching, Matthew opted to try a sensual massage session as a way to re-acclimate himself to a woman’s touch.  While Matthews’ experience is not completely unique, it is his own, so let’s hear about it from his point of view.

I’m Matthew

Hi, I’m Matthew, and I recently had I sensual massage and I believe it improved my sexual confidence. Firstly, a little bit of back story. I have been single for about a year. The breakup was horrendous. It got drawn out and quite ugly, but is now soundly in the past. The relationship  was 4 years long and I was planning on popping the question this summer while on holiday.  Unfortunately, (fortunately),  my ex got sloppy and accidentally revealed that she had been having an affair for two of the four years we were together. I was completely destroyed by this news for a number of reasons, but something she said during the break-up really stuck with me and until recently really messed me up. 

Confidence? What confidence?

She told me she had no choice but to cheat because I was terrible in bed. This is, of course, one of the most volatile and cutting things you can say to a straight man, and it did exactly what she hoped it would:  it took me out at the knees. Long after she was out of my life, after the never-ending boxes of books had been packed and every one of her long blonde hairs had been plucked from the furniture, my jumpers, the cat, etc., I still heard those words in my mind.  Now, you may be thinking, ‘She was just angry, she didn’t mean it. It’s been nearly a year, just get over it.’  If you think I haven’t tried to get past this on my own, you are sadly mistaken.  My confidence was shattered.

Sexual confidence is all in your head

When I say that sexual confidence is ‘ all in your head’, that’s a good thing. It’s good, because it means that you can control it. It took me many months to push past my lack of confidence and get up the courage to even consider being intimate with another woman. Luckily I have a good mate who is the kind you can talk to about almost anything. I shared what she had said. He agreed with my shock and horror and was surprised that I wasn’t more upset by it. He also suggested that as an interim step to dating someone new, that I give myself some time to hook up with some girls and get my mojo back. 

Massage is the perfect answer

Well, I’m just not the hook up kind of guy. I’m a serial monogamist and I’ve never been good at dating around, but I agreed with my friend that I needed to wade into the pool, not jump into the deep end. Since I wasn’t interested in scouring the clubs for one night stands, and I wasn’t committed enough to the process to hire an escort, I was unsure what my options would be. Because it had been awhile I wanted something that didn’t feel too transactional but also no strings attached. That’s when I came across sensual massage. 

Booked and (mostly) ready

After I spent some time on the website and looked at all of the masseuse profiles, I made a decision that sensual massage was the right speed for me. I selected a very attractive masseuse, who looked nothing like my ex, to do the job. My session was for the next day, and as soon as I hung up the phone, I began to get nervous. To be clear I was not nervous about anything bad happening, but I was nervous about having any kind of intimacy after such a dry spell. I know lots of people who really struggled during the pandemic and went without contact for much longer than I have. But for me the combination of being so hurt by her words, so unsure of myself all of a sudden, as well as horny and lonely, I was really in need of a solution. 


When it came time for my appointment, I have to say, everything went smoothly and just as I would have expected. Having never had a professional sensual massage before I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect, but it was very comfortable and nothing about it felt sketchy or weird. I had selected a masseuse that did in-call massage, so I appeared on her doorstep right on time and was warmly welcomed in when she answered. Her flat was in a stylish converted space that was clean and modern. We talked through the details, I paid, and we got down to the session.  To say that the massage itself felt good is a massive understatement. Her hands were absolute magic, I totally opted for the happy ending, and at no point did I feel uncomfortable or embarrassed. Ten out of ten, would do again in a heartbeat.

The session was a full hour, and she made very good use of it

Sadly, time does fly when one is having fun. Next time I would opt for a longer session. What I realised is that as intimate as sensual massage is, and it was, it is still totally transactional. I didn’t feel like I was just a number, or a piece of meat, but it was very clear, in a comfortable way, that we were strangers. Admittedly, I was a bit shy at first and very concerned with being polite or saying or doing the wrong thing. Basically I just followed her instructions and tried to stay out of trouble. Her approach was very laid-back and she was clearly comfortable driving the session which I was grateful for. Once things began, it was hard to be analytical or overthink, because my brain simply went to mush as my muscles were tenderised and my body was teased.

Things that I expected would happen that didn’t

I was fully prepared for this experience to be pleasant but also somewhat humiliating. This was the first time I had ever paid for any kind of intimacy and I wasn’t entirely sure how that made me feel. Now that I’ve been through the experience and I’ve reflected, I’m completely comfortable with it. She was obviously not  under duress or being exploited, nor did she say or do anything to make me uncomfortable or feel anything but cared for. I thought that getting comfortable would be difficult, but it wasn’t. I also thought that I would be more embarrassed about my body. Breakups are not great for waistlines and muscle tone, don’t try to tell me otherwise. I also thought that once would be enough, but I’m already considering my next appointment and whether or not I want to see the same masseuse, or try someone new.

Confidence then and now

When I made the decision to have a sensual massage session, my personal confidence was absolutely shattered. I was at a  low point but I can see now that it was exactly the right choice. When I emerged from my massage, and stepped back into the real world, I felt completely refreshed. Even though I had just paid for that hour and bought this beautiful woman’s attention and touch, she was so authentic in the way that she cared for me, I felt completely validated. I left her flat feeling like a whole new man, as cliche as that sounds. There was just something about watching her touch me that reminded me that I am not foolish and repulsive, and that a cruel comment out of the blue should not be enough to define how I see myself as a man or a lover.

It’s your confidence Journey

Ultimately, I’m not sure that one person can answer the question “Can a sensual massage improve sexual confidence?”. I saw a marked difference between before my session and after.  I had been a wreck for months, so much so that I had lost sight of the possibility of ever connecting with anyone again. Now that I have fully processed the breakup and I have invested in myself, I’m starting to enjoy the journey of new confidence. Can a sensual massage improve sexual confidence for everyone? Maybe not.  I was really ready to feel better and to regain that confidence that had been stripped away from me. Had I tried sensual massage early on in that journey I may not have had the same result. I guess we’ll never know. But do I attribute my newfound sexual confidence to sensual massage? Yes, I absolutely do. It was a game-changer.

What’s not to love?

I’m really glad that I took the leap of faith to try I sensual massage to improve sexual confidence. I really needed a boost but I wasn’t ready for a relationship. I also didn’t want to hurt anyone by sending mixed messages. In the hands of my masseuse I was able to really feel and embody my sexual self. Finally I begin to be able to imagine being truly intimate with a new woman. Despite her harsh critique, my ex never gave any indication that she was unsatisfied. I’m now convinced that it was not a true statement but simply an effective dagger. 

Get what you need

If you’re considering sensual massage because you are a bit down in the dumps or not quite feeling like the best version of yourself, I say do it. The results aren’t universal, but if nothing else you’ll spend an hour with a beautiful woman and you’ll leave with a smile on your face. So much of male sexual confidence is based on feedback. We need feedback, and we like positive feedback, but negative feedback can really damage our egos. If your ego needs a boost, or a bit of repair work, seek out a reputable sensual massage from a reputable masseuse. It can make all the difference in the world. She made me feel seen, she made me feel sexy, and she made me feel like it was possible to enjoy myself again.

Thanks Matthew!

We would very much like to thank Matthew for his candid account of his sensual massage and for being so sharing with us. As you can see from Matthew’s story, our clients come to us for all sorts of reasons, due to all sorts of situations. There’s no reason to feel shy or ashamed of what brings you to your massage, we won’t judge! And just as Matthew described, we know you will leave feeling amazing. 

What are you waiting for?

Erotic massage is a luxury, but also an important part of your sexual health maintenance. Looking to relax? Are you touch-starved from being single? We can meet your every need.

Whether you are looking for a lingam massage or sensual full body tantric massage, we have what you want. Our girls are the most beautiful in London, if not the world! We are absolutely confident that every session you booked with us will be better than the last. No matter your reasons for booking with us, we will always leave you satisfied, to whatever degree you desire.

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