Adult massages can be a great way to relieve stress, improve circulation, and enhance overall well-being. However, it’s important to remember that massages are an intimate experience that requires consent between you and your masseuse. Consent can help ensure a safe and comfortable experience for both of you. With understood consent, you can enjoy all the sexy fun and not worry about a thing.
The basics of consent
To understand how to have the best experience possible at an adult massage, it’s essential to understand the basics of consent.
Essentially, consent is an agreement between two people. In adult massage, this can look like you agreeing to be massaged by your masseuse. It can also look like your masseuse agreeing to give you a happy ending but declining to have sex with you. Consent is essential for both parties to feel comfortable and safe in a sexy environment.
Either person can withdraw their consent at any time. This is very important to understand respect. You, as a client, can leave a massage if you are uncomfortable, and your masseuse can end the massage if she feels uncomfortable.
Consent is all about respecting another person and their boundaries. It’s not something to be argued against or to try and sway another person into changing their mind.
Consent and adult massage
An adult massage is fun and sexy, but that doesn’t mean you can assume what will happen. Because adult massage is highly erotic, it is crucial to have explicit consent and boundaries. The client and the masseuse should have a conversation before the massage begins to discuss the kind of massage, where the masseuse can and can’t touch the client, and what expectations both people have. If the masseuse doesn’t explicitly agree to sexual activity, don’t ask for it or push your masseuse to give it to you. She is there to provide a specific service, and you have agreed to those conditions. Respect what she has consented to and set boundaries, and you’ll have a wonderful time.
Consent should be freely given
Consent must be given without any pressure or threats. You are hiring your masseuse to provide you with an erotic massage, but that doesn’t mean you can bully her into agreeing to do things outside the scope of the massage. Pressuring or threatening your masseuse may result in a false consent agreement because she feels unsafe. Make sure you approach your masseuse with kindness and honesty so that she can consent to massage you freely and easily.
What kind of consent can you give?
You might think that you don’t need to give any consent, but that’s just not true. As a client, you have many things you can consent to or say you don’t want to happen. First and foremost is getting an adult massage in the first place. By hiring an adult masseuse, you’re consenting to an adult massage.
The next set of things you can consent to is where your masseuse can and can’t touch you. Your masseuse should respect your boundaries, and you have the right to point out when that is not happening. If you don’t like having your feet touched, you can revoke consent to have them touched. If you’re comfortable with everything being massaged, that’s a form of consent.
You can also consent or decline a happy ending. Happy endings are legal in the UK but that doesn’t mean they are required for an adult massage. You can happily enjoy the erotic atmosphere and your stunning masseuse without a happy ending.
What kind of consent does the masseuse give?
Your masseuse has the right to consent or decline many activities. It all begins with her consenting to give you a massage. Yes, you may have hired her but she always has the right to stop a massage if she becomes uncomfortable or something is wrong. This is something you should respect and not argue with her about.
Your masseuse is also consenting on what kind of massage she’s giving you. Whether that’s a full body massage or an erotic soapy massage, she’s agreeing to give you a particular kind of service.
Lastly, your masseuse can also consent to you touching or flirting with her. Not every masseuse wants to have you touch her and it’s her right to decline when you ask. The fun and sexy atmosphere doesn’t mean that you have rights to her body and you should not think so.
Understand what you’re consenting to
If you’re new to the world of adult massage, make sure to ask questions of your masseuse. If you’re not sure what the massage is going to entail exactly, she can explain it to you. This way you’re fully informed and truly understand what you’re consenting to. Ask clarifying questions whenever you need to. This will help make sure that both of you understand what’s about to happen, in what order, and what the general expectations of each other are.
When consent is broken
If consent is broken by either the client or the masseuse, the massage should pause or stop immediately. If both people are able to solve the problem – say, the masseuse touched your feet because she forgot and you accept her apology – the massage may continue. But if it can’t be solved or the consent violation is exceptionally egregious, the massage should completely end.
Whoever broke the consent agreements should apologize to the other person, making it clear they understand what they did wrong. If your masseuse ends your massage, don’t argue with her. Apologize, get dressed, and leave. It is the best thing you can do in that moment.
Respecting each other
Remember that consent is all about respecting each other as people. It’s not a set-up or a way to see if you fail a test. It’s just about making sure both of you are on the same page and are ready to have the same experience together. It’s very simple and easy to do. Don’t get all spun up about whether or not you’re going to ruin the whole thing because of a mistake. Many masseuses are understanding and, depending on the mistake, may be willing to continue with the massage after correcting you.
Just keep in mind the basic rules of respecting others and treating them kindly and you’ll do just fine.
Be a safe client
One of the best things you can do on your side of things is to be a safe client. This will help your masseuse feel comfortable giving you a massage and want to take care of you even better.
Being safe looks like respecting your masseuse’s time by showing up promptly and leaving without dawdling. It means clearly stating your boundaries and listening closely when your masseuse is explaining hers. And it also means acknowledging when you make a mistake without kicking up a fuss.
Being a safe client means your masseuse will want to see you again and again and she’ll keep giving you the best adult massages of your life.
If the masseuse makes you uncomfortable
If your consent is broken or the masseuse is too pushy or generally makes you feel uncomfortable, do not stay on the massage table and deal with it. You absolutely have the right to get up, get dressed, and leave. Do not let your masseuse take advantage of your vulnerability. Speak up, tell her you’re uncomfortable, and decide if you want to continue the massage or leave. You don’t owe your masseuse anything other than what you agreed to at the beginning of your appointment. And don’t feel bad about leaving a massage if that’s what you choose to do. It’s important to take care of yourself and both your physical and emotional safety.
Keep things comfortable
Keeping things fun and flirty is so simple and easy to do. Respect your masseuse, listen to her boundaries, and stick to them. That’s it! It isn’t hard to do at all.
Enjoy your adult massage for what it is and you’re sure to have a comfortable and sexy experience. Both of you will have a great time if you’re feeling at ease and build a little bit of trust with each other. Hiring the same masseuse again and again will help build that trust and keep things comfy between you two. And by keeping things comfortable, your relaxation will just deepen and you’re sure to have a better time each time you come back.
Don’t push boundaries
Your masseuse may have certain boundaries that she asks you to respect. This could be a boundary of you touching her or having sex with you. Whatever it is, you should respect that boundary and not bring it up, asking her if she’ll change her mind. This kind of badgering is extremely disrespectful and a valid reason for your masseuse to end the appointment. And even if your masseuse does change her mind, how can you be sure that she agreed because she actually wants to and not to get you stop bothering her? That’s not fun for anyone. Respect the boundaries she lays out and you’re going to have a better time overall.
Consent ensures safety
All of these consent practices add up to safety. For both you and your masseuse.
You will feel safe undressing and laying on a table for a masseuse to touch you if you understand what she’s going to do and have agreed to it. Being nude under a stranger’s hands can be very vulnerable but, with consent, you can feel safe and secure that she’s going to do only what she said she’s going to do.
Your masseuse will feel safe as you prove you can respect her boundaries and not press her for something more. She will feel safe and secure if you don’t touch her without permission or ask for services she doesn’t offer. Help your masseuse feel safe by sticking to the rules you’ve agreed to.
Enjoy your safe and comfortable massage
This steps are so simple and easy to do. With some basic respect, you’ll be able to help create a safe and comfortable environment for both you and your masseuse. It doesn’t take much effort to understand consent and respect it. You’ll ensure that you’re getting the best and sexiest massage possible from a woman who feels secure with you. Keep things fun and sexy by sticking to your agreements and enjoy the experience that is being offered to you. You’re going to have an incredible time no matter what so don’t worry about the things that are off the table. Adult massages are so much fun on their own that you’re sure to want to come back again and again.
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